creative systems flow

Think flow.

One common misconception is that Taking Children Seriously simply replaces coercion with win-win problem-solving when there is an obvious problem like a clash between parent and child.

Dynamic tradition and children

Determining which guidance to explore and which to reject is a very subtle skill, and it cannot be learned in an environment where guidance is compulsory.

“What do you mean by ‘problem’?”

A problem is something which gives rise to human thought—such as a conflict between two theories, a paradox or anomaly. It does not only refer to ‘bad problems’—conflicts between people, problems that seem to make people miserable, things we would rather avoid. Anything sparking thinking, including enormously enjoyable thinking, like when you notice something and wonder about it, following your curiosity wherever it leads, is a ‘problem’ in this wide sense.

A commitment to figuring it out

We look for solutions that everyone, children included, feel good about. We figure it out! And we relish figuring it out!

“How can I become more aware of anti-rational parts in my mind?”

Drop the second guessing and scrutinising and judging. It is as toxic for us as that kind of thing is for our children. If you are not feeling free—free to think, free to be and free to act in accordance with your own ideas, your thinking flying free as a bird—it might be that you are seizing up your thinking with scrutiny and judgement, objectifying yourself as a parent.

Taking Children Seriously: it is rocket science!

Is this easy? It’s about as easy as it was for humans to get to the moon for the first time ever. But the way to get to the moon isn’t just to wait for things to get in the way and then work round them one by one (although, that’s important too): it’s by building a spaceship and making it work.